| December 3, 2004 | Lyrics to "Cool as Jessica Barron" |
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As evidence that my life is like living inside a cartoon -- I submit to you the lyrics to an mp3 that was emailed to me somewhat mysteriously by a stranger in November. The song is actually not too bad, and the lyrics are smart, semi-disdainful but not as scathing as they probably could be. I'm not mad about it. Should I be? You know that I'm totally gonna play this on my radio show... How could I resist? According to the info attached to the mp3 it was written/performed by Jeremy Abbate who may be the same guy who wrote this piece for McSweeney's. I love how Googling can make anyone an amateur detective. Kinda like how the internet and computers and digital tools enable all of us to be publishers, editors, writers, DJs, photographers, videographers, and musicians distributing our songs around the world. Seriously, check this song out. It amuses me greatly. Cool as Jessica Barron written and performed by Jeremy Abbate I wanna be as cool as Jessica Barron Please let me be as cool as Jessica Barron She's a media philosopher She's an irony diva in a post-post world She's an artist and a critic and a poet too And you can bet her friends are cooler than you And she's travelled everywhere from here to East Jebip and she keeps a photo diary of everything hip Oh she's witty and she's clever and she's very sublime She's on the inside and the outside at the very same time. She muses on the simple things and finds so much depth She lives life and she mocks life -- all in the same breath. I wanna be as cool as Jessica Barron Please let be as cool as Jessica Barron She's Mary McCarthy meets Betty Paige The Zelda Fitzgerald of the techno age Virgina Woolf as Billie Holiday A love child of Marilyn and Hemingway And there isn't any subject that is too taboo Deconstructing cheap pornography or Winnie-The-Poo Her inner self is sprawled across the bathroom walls Her private sanctuary is a shopping mall If just for a minute I could stand inside her shoes -- Would the cocktail party carousel chase away my blues? I wanna live my life in public and share every thought with a generation starving for what they've been taught. Warhol said we'd get a quarter hour But Jessica's embraced her media power Nothing is sacred and everything is deep The soap commercial theme song makes the poet in her weep I wanna be as cool as Jessica Barron Please let me be as cool as Jessica Barron I wanna be as cool as Jessica Batton Please let me be so cool like Jessica Barron posted by Jess Barron @ 8:49 PM 
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